Category: Diary

Guys with blonde hair and big smiles who drive silver convertibles always look as though they’re over compensating.

Always.

It started off in a sleepy blur. I registered Rae had got out of bed and then I heard her talking to the cat. I finally put together the words ‘oh’,’poor baby’,’blood’,’try to breath’ with the memory he didn’t come in when called last night. Our Tom had been hit by a car.

Rae was wonderful. She bundled Tom up, got through to me as I awoke to get Phee ready after she left and then called the local vet. Poor Tom, his eyes were so wide and he was labouring to breath. He could still walk though, and complained when he was picked up. The local vet sent Rae and Tom off to the nearest open major animal hospital, the Melbourne University Veterinary School in Werribee. I got Phee together – thank god she’s only 6 and is more than happy being told that Mum had to go to work very early – and dropped her off at her Nana’s.

I went to Werribee and waited with Rae. I’m not sure how long it was before the vet came out. Tom has a broken jaw, swelling on the brain that is causing blindness (both hopefully only temporary), possible fractured pelvis and maybe some urinary tract damage – we won’t know for sure until tomorrow. They need to stabilise him first before doing more tests. The amazing thing is that, even though he’d been hit and was blind he managed to find his way through a park, over a two and half metre fence and in to his outside box where he was safe and warm.

I know they are ‘only’ pets but this cat is such a part of our family. We’re not telling Phee just now. One reason, it’s her last day of school tomorrow so it’s best she gets through that, and another is we really don’t know yet what the situation is. We’re going to say we haven’t seen him if she asks where he is (as she always does). We both think she will cope a lot better knowing exactly what is going on rather than saying Tom is not well and we have to wait and see. So tonight wish us luck as we try not to let on.

Now we wait until we can call to see how he is. Damn that clock is moving slow.

LEGO Dilbert.

I was told in a meeting today that I was just like Wally. It was the greatest thing anyone has ever said to me at work.

The Guests From Hell have had a baby.

They named the poor child Jada Katholeen. I did not mistype the second name.

I think to fully appreciate the effect you need to say it in a hillbilly drawl.

“Jahdar Kath-oh-leeeen, git in ‘ere an eat ya vitals’

Further to my telemarketing adventure of a few days ago I found this – the anti-telemarketing counterscript (courtesy of Daniel’s magnificent diary). As they describe on the page the power dynamic in a telemarketing conversation is established by the caller’s strict adherence to a script. This page contains a script for you – the harassed recipient.

At the end of the script there’s even a handy printable version to keep by the phone.

It seems that telemarketers in the USA must have run out phone numbers.

The phone rings today at lunch. Strange accent asks for Mr Bartlett. Seeing as how Mr Bartlett doesn’t exist and therefore won’t complain I say ‘speaking’. It’s a telemarketer from San Diego trying to palm off some dodgy software deal. Next time I’m going to ask them to hold and then take Phee for a walk down the street.

Yesterday was the jumper presentation/family day for the Doggies. Rae got to have a good perve at her favourite boys and Phee even overcame her shyness to have her photo taken with Woofa (click picture on left) and some of the boys. For some reason Rae was most keen for Phee to have her pic taken with Luke Darcy.

Nothing says happy christmas like … a box of citrus fruit?

It must be an American thing.

www.melbourneice.com is live. It’s a good feeling to see something you’ve worked on for so long finally make it to publication. So, what do you think?
Nigel – will take you up on your offer when I have all the files.