We have a spider problem. No. Phee has a spider problem. No, that’s not right either. She’s not infested or suddenly grown six superfluous legs. Phee has a problem with spiders.
It’s quite unnerving to watch her enter a room. She stands in the door way and her eyes roll up and scan every millimetre of the ceiling looking for ‘them’. Even more disconcerting is that five minutes later as you are talking to her her eyes will do a Linda Blair and roll upwards once more, just to make sure none of ‘her friends’ (…with friends like these….) have entered.
We’ve told her she’s no longer allowed to look at the ceiling (what sort of parent has to say that? “I’m sorry sweet Petunia, you are not allowed to look upwards until the age of 21.”) and any talk of spiders will result in her life support being turned off.